Just Think About It

High end cars, money, naked girls, drunk guys, intentional  PDA post, the #goals photo…

My brain is about to hit the snooze button as I lie in bed. All comfy and cozy in my sheets, with the fan on to create a cooler environment. But wait! I need to scroll through Instagram… because it’s out of habitual habit. Catch my drift?

As I am scrolling through the popular page on Instagram, that’s all I see. High end cars while awkwardly sitting in the front seat looking “wealthy AF.. right? That’s how you use AF, or that’s why the kids are saying these days.

Any who… Stacks on stacks because it’s payday so of course you need to brag. Naked girls, well girls in bikinis that shouldn’t even pass as fabric, drunk guys on spring break making regretful decisions, straddling couple because it’s cute and they’re “in love” and oh yeah below in the comments everyone says #goals.

As Jesus says, for what our heart breaks over, His breaks more.

I look at these photos, these provocative, sexual, soft porn, selfish, me me me, boasting, shallow photos of what people live and become so jealous for, my heart breaks! In other words, #goals.


I am serious when I say it. My heart breaks so much for this world. For where we are at, emotionally, spiturually and mentally. We have become such shallow, selfish humans and it completely and utterly breaks me.

This life is hell on earth for some and I couldn’t agree more. We rely so much on how many likes we get on a photo, I know you’ve heard this before but it’s true!! We rely so much on how to get the perfect angle, light, whatever it is. IT’S SHALLOW. We need to create this “look at me” lifestyle and it’s so sad. It’s sad that this is what majority of us worry about on a day to day basis. When there are actual life threatening issues going on in this world. And by world, I mean outside of the United States.

We have it SO well, almost too well because each day I bet some of us take it totally for granted, since it’s almost as if we deserve it because we live in such a country of high accessibility and opporunity.

Personally, it’s hard to do life sometimes because of the people I run into, see across at the coffee shop or just overhear while taking my daily walks. It just blows my mind of the problems that people worry over. I am not saying your problems are less than, at all. I am just simply saying, instead of sweating the materialistic stuff that will only benefit you and you only, may sweat over the massive stuff that can effect, your future, and your children’s future, yah? The time is now to figure out how the future will end up and I cannot imagine how much more selfish someone can get and how much more powerful the internet will be.

Stop getting angry at the government or the president for how shitty the world is… we the people of this country have free will. We have choices and if it’s going to be selfish from here on out, then… we are done for. However, if we decide to sweat over something that can effect your tomorrow, maybe some hearts will start to change and materialistic things will just become things. Maybe then, they will not have such a massive control on our daily lives anymore.

Get over the comparison game. Does that help you in any way? Does that benefit you in any way?

I am going to guess no and no.

SO WHY KEEP IT UP? Because that’s what the world says to do. Obsess over celebrities that are JUST LIKE US, they just so happen to have access to show off their talent in more ways than others. Or how about going crazy over what life that person has and how yours sucks. You have a roof? You have a food? You have clothes? You have clean water for showering and doing the dishes? You are living like a king or queen my friend!

I can imagine just a wee bit of what could happen if we put all the energy that we do through obsessing over social media and having the best of whatever or getting famous, into something that truly matters.

Politics, helping the hungry, going overseas and helping at orphanges or people you may know that are the less fortunate. How about including that person who is always left out or even putting down that phone and actually conversing with that person whom you asked to hang out with. Allowing common sense to become common sense, again. Just think where our world would be? I am not saying world peace but I am saying we could be more on the positive scale rather than the negative, envious, selfish, entitiled scale.

Just think about it.



Expectations and Reality.

When I was younger, I was told to not have expectations for others because everyone will let you down at some point. Then there’s the Golden rule: treat others how you would like to be treated. I consciously started doing that more, yet I received nothing in return. When that was happening, I was so confused because I thought if I treated others well, I am suppose to get that in return. Not the case, it all comes down to where’s your heart at? My heart was at if I do this for you, you need to do that back. A. Selfish heart B. My expectations. Later on I was told I should figure out why I was doing what I was doing and if my heart was in the right place. Over the years my heart has been mending on the whole, have no expectations and do it with a giving heart not wanting heart.

This past year, I’ve done a lot of random acts of kindness for my family, friends, others and have received a few things in return without expectations. It was such a great feeling, of being known I am wanted, being thought of and cared for. However these past couple months I decided I love to make others happy and go out of my way to do nice things but I was like maybe I should leave the ball in there court now, just take a step back from making peoples day, be selfish for my own sake and see what happens. I have done that, I have not texted, laid low on the random acts and did not call. I tell you what; these past 5 months have been the most edifying, hurtful, tough, blessed, encouraging, and realizing months. The people who thought were my friends and did love me or cared for me, did not reach out to me. I am barely ever on my phone; I also deleted social media off my phone. Hardly any one texts me, no one really ever calls and people don’t ask anything about my life or what’s going on. When I see them, they ask why I haven’t talked to them and where I’ve been. Um, hello this works both ways and then they never know what to say or they are “busy”. Then I did come to conclusion, they really don’t care because if they did they would make time for your friendship and would keep in contact.

It’s so hurtful because I thought I could trust those people, if I stopped initiating everything that they’d be curious as too what is up. No, that is definitely not the case. I don’t really deserve or need people in my life that don’t want to genuinely ask me how my life is without me starting that conversation. It has shown me what type of a priority I am to those people and where I stand. It sucks and really hurts, however I am seeing the silver lining so clearly. I’ve been in constant prayer all year about having only edifying friendships, relationships and situations in my life. If that means cutting out literally everyone and some family members so be it. You and I do not need toxic friends in our lives; if they are not bringing positivity at all, why keep them around? Because you have known them the longest or you can use them from being not lonely? No, my logic is that if they don’t bring positivity in your life, boost you up, initiate some conversation or you cant trust, they shouldn’t be in your life. The only person I have a couple great friends, which I am so incredibly blessed and grateful for. I honestly have only 1 person I can rely on 100% with right now and that is my Lord and Savior, Jesus. I honestly never thought it’d come down to this and be completely ok with it. It might sound lame or dumb, its not! He is the ONLY person who will NEVER let you down, NEVER not care for you, Never not love you, NEVER not be there for you and NEVER just not be your friend. He is my everything; I’ve grown spiritually, mentally and emotionally so incredibly much these past couple of months because of the trials and tribulations I have been through. Without having others, using my phone or social media, its so nice to realize and see who is there for and you and who is not. It’s refreshing, comforting and life changing. As if it didn’t come at a right time either! God is amazing, His timing is PERFECT and He will never let you or me down that is His promise. (Psalm 55:22) Next time you feel so lonely or you need a change, do a friendventory or figure out what is negative in your life. You are the ONLY person that can change that area. Maybe talk to the Righteous Selfless, Merciful, and Graceful, PERFECT King because He has been and will always be waiting to hear from you (:


Big City Dreamer