Kia Ora, It’s been awhile since I have written my thoughts out, but in this case typed out. I have so much to say but not sure how to say it. So for now I’ll leave you with this.
Class of 2017 is not the year I will graduating. If I stayed on a certain road, it would have been. However, in life, there are risks, opportunities, open doors and decisions you will have to make. Being in my early 20’s, these are the times to be selfish. These are the years to make your own decisions without having your parent/guardian control you. These are the years that will be the most impactful because… you will never get these years back.
I’ve had many people voice their opinions about some choices I’ve made and are making currently, as in; I will fail and not be anything or make anything of myself. But, I’ve also had voices of others and their encouragement in my selfish yet, courageous choices of how this will make me and possibly break me in so many ways.
I believe at the end of the day when you have the freedom and the opportunities like myself that have been given, to take the crazy non-worldly way and just go for it. I believe life is about being spontaneous, being smart, living it on the edge at times and just learning and absorbing as much as possible. No matter how hard, uncomfortable, scary, crazy it can be. You’ll build so much character in that in itself for choosing that wild card of choice. Embrace that, really think sometimes about the choices you make. Yes, I wish I did finish out school but for a hot second though. I realized that school will always be there. Careers will always be there. Graduation will always be there. But opportunities like this, to experience this beautiful, beautiful place that I get to call earth, now that doesn’t come every day. I’ve been stretched so much spiritually in the way of “what do I want to believe in, instead of what I’ve been told my whole life”. I’ve been pulled in so many different ways of “relying on myself to find x,y and z, etc etc.” and I’ve been emotionally challenged of being in a new environment of not knowing a single soul, yet putting myself out there in situations that could be safe and or dangerous.
I have a thing of not following the rules or even the ways of the world. Go to school, get a job, get a boyfriend, get married, have kids, etc etc.
With traveling, comes LOTS and lots of sacrifices. I’ve missed countless birthdays of my baby nieces and family members. I’ve missed holidays, I’ve denied job opportunities, I’ve had to leave blossoming friendships because of the choices of getting up and living in a suitcase. It’s hard and it does suck. It’s not ideal yeah, but when you have special authentic friends, you’ll know they will be there for you during and at the end waiting with arms wide open. You’ll have pictures to look at from the countless birthdays and holidays missed. But reality is though, that’s life. It happens fast. You’ll have to miss those amazing times and isolate yourself from that comfortable community when choosing the path less chosen. However I’ve seem to make it this far… I think I can keep it going. Thank goodness for technology because it still blows my mind I can chat to someone on the other side of the world at different times of the day… I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that.
Well I could go on for days as I said, I have lots to say. However, I’ll leave it here. New Zealand is beautiful. I’m so glad I made this choice and it’s been nothing but beautiful and struggle since I’ve been here. The joy of the Lord is within, thus I can praise Him through the good and the bad!!!